We are obviously a ladies class, particularly interested in what the Scripture holds for us. We have already learned that everyone is called to submit. Our favorite verse is the one stating that wives are called to submit to their husbands. So perhaps a good way to set up a study on what that means is to first look at what a husband’s responsibility is. And it’s always easier to look at what someone else is supposed to do, rather than what I am supposed to do…
Also, I have been torn about how to strike a balance in this class. At first I thought this topic would be too married women focused. I didn’t want that because there are members of the class who aren’t married, and sometimes there will be people in our lives who may need guidance who aren’t married. So I think we need to learn about how the Bible applies to people in circumstances unlike ours, but even so, I didn’t want this to seem like a married ladies class. But the topic tonight is a little narrow. I can only hope that those of us who aren’t married can still take something from the topic – I believe that you will still learn about the heart of God and his plan for our life, even if this doesn’t directly apply to you.
As we have learned, God designed the world with a system of authority. Those in authority will be called to answer for the exercise (or lack of exercise) of that authority. This extends to husbands, wives, parents, teachers, elders, etc. When you are put in the role of leader, whether it is as a husband, as a parent, or as a teacher, you are to exemplify God. You are to be a model of God. Failure to model God properly is what will lead to a harsh judgment because it will mean that you have misrepresented God.
Ephesians 5:22-28 - 22Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. 23For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. 25Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her 26to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, 27and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. 28In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.
In 1 Peter 3:7 another requirement of the husband is found. “Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.”
So the list that we have now of the requirements of a husband include:
1. Be the head of your wife
2. Love your wife
3. Be the spiritual leader of the home
4. Live with consideration and respect
HEAD OF THE WIFE
1 Corinthians 11:3 - Now I want you to realize that the head of every man is Christ, and the head of the woman is man, and the head of Christ is God.
This seems like a pretty simple directive. The problems come in with self gets in the way. People want what they want, almost like children. I can tell Joseph not to pull my glasses off my face and he cries. He wants what he wants. Grown ups act the very same way. God devised a simple plan for us, but we insert our selves and mess it up.
Christ is the leader of the church. All decisions made are for the benefit of the church. Did we ever see Christ exhibit selfishness toward the church? Did he make a decision so that he could personally gain? Did he make decisions that benefited the church in the present, but set it up for failure in the future? You can imagine there were tough decisions to be made for the church by Christ.
This is all just my imagination at work, but do you think Jesus wanted to call Judas as an apostle? Knowing the result of that decision, can’t you imagine that there might have been a part of Christ that dreaded making that decision? Here are some verses about the result of that decision.
John 6:70 - Then Jesus replied, "Have I not chosen you, the Twelve? Yet one of you is a devil!"
John 12:3-6 - 3Then Mary took about a pint of pure nard, an expensive perfume; she poured it on Jesus' feet and wiped his feet with her hair. And the house was filled with the fragrance of the perfume. 4But one of his disciples, Judas Iscariot, who was later to betray him, objected, 5"Why wasn't this perfume sold and the money given to the poor? It was worth a year's wages." 6He did not say this because he cared about the poor but because he was a thief; as keeper of the money bag, he used to help himself to what was put into it.
Luke 22:3 - Then Satan entered Judas, called Iscariot, one of the Twelve.
Matthew 26:14-15 - 14Then one of the Twelve—the one called Judas Iscariot—went to the chief priests 15and asked, "What are you willing to give me if I hand him over to you?" So they counted out for him thirty silver coins.
Matthew 26:25 - Then Judas, the one who would betray him, said, "Surely not I, Rabbi?" Jesus answered, "Yes, it is you."
Matthew 27:3-5 - 3When Judas, who had betrayed him, saw that Jesus was condemned, he was seized with remorse and returned the thirty silver coins to the chief priests and the elders. 4"I have sinned," he said, "for I have betrayed innocent blood." "What is that to us?" they replied. "That's your responsibility." 5So Judas threw the money into the temple and left. Then he went away and hanged himself.
What was the benefit of selecting Judas as an apostle? Why was this leadership at work?
Christ made a decision which he knew would result in pain, torture, humiliation, and eventual death. Why did he do that?
The end result was Jesus death on the cross which was the ONLY way the church could receive eternal salvation. We are told time and again that Jesus was the only avenue by which the church would be saved.
“Nor is there salvation in any other, for there is no other name under heaven given among men by which we must be saved.” (Acts 4:12)
“For there is one God and one Mediator between God and men, the Man Christ Jesus, who gave Himself a ransom for all …” (1 Timothy 2:5)
Jesus said to him, “I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through Me.” (John 14:6)
LOVE YOUR WIFE AS CHRIST LOVED THE CHURCH, SACRIFICING YOURSELF
We know that when Jesus was on the earth he was a spiritual being in an earthly body. The fact that he was in an earthly body meant that he experienced earthly feelings and temptation.
I can tell you that there are some things on the earth that simply do not tempt me to evil. I have never been tempted by alcohol. The idea of allowing a beverage to make me act recklessly or to make me careless with my money just holds nothing over me. Satan cannot use alcohol to tempt me. Don’t get me wrong – there are plenty of other things that he can use, just not alcohol. For a temptation to exist, there must be a desire in your heart. When we read in Matthew 4:1-11 about the temptation of Christ, we need to keep in mind that the things presented to Christ by Satan had to have been things that appealed to Christ’s earthly body or there would have been no temptation. The text would have possibly read that Satan showed Christ things that he hoped would provide a temptation. But instead the text said that Christ was taken to be tempted by Satan.
In this instance Christ made a decision to forego what would be immediately gratifying because to do so would be the ruin of the church. If he had turned the stones to bread, had chosen to show Satan that the angels would save him, or had chosen to pledge allegiance to Satan in order to rule the whole world, there would be no church today. There would only be evil. Instead, 2000 years later there is still a church, a body of believers to stand for God.
The ultimate sacrifice, of course, was on the cross. I know we have probably all read or been told the verses from the Bible recounting the last supper, the prayer in the garden, the carrying of the cross, the beating, the piercing of his side, and his ultimate death.
Even though it is not Scripture, one way that helps me envision the act of his death is the song Night with Ebon Pinion. The lyrics say,
Night, with ebon pinion, brooded o’er the vale;
All around was silent, save the night wind’s wail,
When Christ, the Man of Sorrows,
In tears, and sweat, and blood,
Prostrate in the garden, raised His voice to God.
Smitten for offenses which were not His own,
He, for our transgressions, had to weep alone;
No friend with words to comfort,
Nor hand to help was there,
When the Meek and Lowly humbly bowed in prayer.
“Abba, Father, Father, if indeed it may,
Let this cup of anguish pass from Me, I pray;
Yet, if it must be suffered, by Me, Thine only Son,
Abba, Father, Father, let Thy will be done.”
Christ knew how terrible this was going to be. As we’ve already talked about, he had an earthly body. The nails driven into his hand actually hurt. His thirst on the cross felt to him the same way it would have felt to us.
This is the same level of love that a husband in submission to God is to exhibit to his wife. That’s a lot to live up to.
SPIRITUAL LEADER
Joshua 24:14-15 - "Now fear the LORD and serve him with all faithfulness. Throw away the gods your forefathers worshiped beyond the River and in Egypt, and serve the LORD. But if serving the LORD seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your forefathers served beyond the River, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you are living. But as for me and my household, we will serve the LORD."
The husband is to lead his household by the word of God. This should involve leading the family in devotion, prayer, worship, singing, etc. But how is it that he is to lead the family? As a servant.
Philippians 2:5-7 - Your attitude should be the same as that of Christ Jesus: Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness.
Christ could have come to earth and said, “I’m God’s son. Do as I say.”
But instead he chose to be a servant. A Godly husband desiring to be like Christ will choose to be a servant. In John 1:1-15, Jesus washes the apostles’ feet. Verse 15 states, “I have set you an example that you should do as I have done for you.” He didn’t just tell the apostles what to do, he showed them. A husband is to Practice What He Preaches.
LIVE WITH CONSIDERATION AND RESPECT
I am a big fan of this one. I also like Proverbs 31:28 - "Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her."
• Be considerate refers to treating a spouse with the utmost care and love. It is the husband’s responsibility to set the tone of love and care! Keep in mind that this was called for in a time and culture that considered women lower than farm animals! It was taught in a culture where the male ruled in absolute dominance. The mandate to love in 1 Corinthians was abnormal.
• Weaker partner refers to the physical condition of women or perhaps their social standing. The application is to show more consideration. This is not because of inferiority or that one is better than the other. We have different strengths and weaknesses, but we are all heirs.
• As heirs means we can fellowship together in Christ. We both receive love from Christ and are equal participants in salvation.
• Hinder your prayers means the husband who fails to show consideration jeopardizes his ability to communicate effectively with God. When we refuse to follow God’s plan, we become separated from God and his blessings.
So this week we saw that the husband has four basic requirements in his relationship with his wife:
1. Be the head of your wife
2. Love your wife
3. Be the spiritual leader of the home
4. Live with consideration and respect
And we also saw that to understand how a husband is to act, we have to look to how Jesus treated the church. We saw that Jesus made tough decisions that only served to benefit the church. We saw that Jesus sacrificed his personal comfort for the good of the church. We saw that Jesus sacrificed his life so that the church could have eternal life. We saw that Jesus lead by example with the heart of a servant. We know that Jesus lives with us in consideration. Despite our flawed condition, we are all joint heirs.
Our memory verse for the week is not pulled from the lesson, but is just a reminder of why we are here, what our goal should be. It is Psalms 119:10-11 - "I seek you with all my heart; do not let me stray from your commands. I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you."
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